Sunday, 30 October 2011
Friday night, I went to a Dark Medieval Banquet at Coombe Abbey. An old abbey in some gorgeous woodland,about 20 minutes from where I live. Which is suppose to be haunted, but is just interior gorgeousness, if you are into architecture, this place is a must see.
The best part of the night was exploring the abbey, and getting scared going through to the food hall, by some evil monks and other dark people in the stables, didn't see them coming and I did scream, but a woman in front of me screaming and yelling ' Don't hurt me I'm a christian' was classic..
A very Unique experience..
Monday, 24 October 2011
The other day I was looking for a folder of paper to do some writing and I found an old pile in the bottom of a drawer. I Picked it up and this single piece of paper literally fell out. Its scribbled in crazy handwriting, which looks like mine, but with passion and urgency behind it. I read it and I have absolutely no recollection of penning it. But it sounds like me all over. Lots of questions, I think it must of been of when I was a christian about a year, and was really wrestling my some self worth stuff..'
Its Defiantly Interesting, let me know what you think!
'To Be a servant of Heaven and all the things it brings, to walk into the shadow places. where darkness rests and and draws more strength for its evil schemes. To walk boldly into these destitute places, daring to go, with my lamp burning brightly. To walk the path of uncertainty and yet at the same time know that I will be looked after is certain.
A light bringer, a vision of sunrises to the Hell's on Earth's. Can I be that bold?
To speak to those whose eyes and face tell of unspeakable pain, to try to break through their built up facade. Can I do it ?
To know that I may never see a harvest, yet plant so many seeds. Can I be that patient?
What would happen? If the places of hurt, that can't feel God were to come to his glory?
Am I bringing my full potential to God?
What do I have to offer?
Can I be used in his grand scheme of things?
I want to be on fire his his kingdom. I want to see society's fall down in awe of the holy spirits presence. I want to see nations come before you God, thousand getting baptised at a time, where heavenly songs proclaiming your name as mighty, will be heard all over the earth, bringing peace to all.
Can I have a part to play in that?
Am I already?
Am I of any use in that plan? I know the lord will use me, but with my small head I cannot comprehend how.
But the lord is mighty and I don not worry about such things, he will guide me and lead me to still and beautiful waters.'
I feel I can answer these questions back to me, from 4 years on down the road with God ... What an Amazing journey it has been so far....
Saturday, 22 October 2011
I love listening to this guy, and this song is really just about Gods Joy over us. and how he loves to bestow us with glimpses of his beauty....
I defy you to listen to this song and not lift your arms in praise,,,,
Saturday, 15 October 2011
This morning on the Bus, my ipod was on shuffle and this song came on. And at the risk of sounding corny... it was so fitting walking into work, the sun was proper shining, no clouds, but crisp and cold. I literally floated to work, it was beautiful..this feeling lasted only a few seconds once in work, but hay ho. And the song just reminded me of how much of a good film American beauty is....
It really was a Hollywood movie moment, in Coventry...
Friday, 14 October 2011
In the week, I was in church and I met a nice lady on the Alpha course. Later that evening when she had done that session, We met by the cakes, she was saying goodbye I was still eating...I asked her how she was getting on, and she said yeah good, she was (her actual words) just trying to focus on fitting in at the church at the moment...
This really racked me off, (not the lady she was just being truthful and to be honest I did the exact same thing, for the first few months I came to church). I replied not very gracefully 'sack fitting in at church', I told her God didn't make her to fit in. I did want to also add ' Be who God made you to be we don't need any more clean faced christian clones'. But I held my tongue for a change. Its a miracle!
Now this lady has made a huge step by her coming into our church and now she feels she needs to change.. WTFlip.....
How did this happen. What does that say about me and my church?
Go back to NT days.. did people join the apostle gang and think 'Crap, I need to become like Paul or peter, nah man, the group was full of weirdos and specials and average peeps, they couldn't copy each other if they tried...
Like that guy you see walking down the street and you pray to yourself 'please don't talk to me ' He would of been in the gang.. or the guy doing the street cleaning job that is so beneath you... He's
in... Would they join Gods church and also feel the need to change?. I am not sure I am gonna like the answer to that.
'Is committing ones life to Christ also a commitment to a loss of identity and individuality'... what do you think Jesus would say?
Difference is what makes the world and the church amazing.... In fact this diversity glorifies God. So why does someone go into a church and automatically feel the need to stop what Gods made them in personality? Does this mean in fact we are stopping his Gods glory shine through that person... The church puts a bucket over a shining light and says stop glowing that way, only sparkle like this...
Maybe it sounds like a rant, I don't mean it too, I am preaching to myself as much as anyone... but as a person who has never really fitted into church and hopefully will never fully do, I still get shocked, have I lost some of my God given Identity by walking through the church doors every Sunday ? Urrhhh. Wobble!
As to the lady, this week I am gonna sit with her and tell her to be as unique as possible... hopefully that comes into the Alpha course at some point. When she has only been going to church 2 weeks and already she is trying to put on the religious front, she needs to Know, what the church sometimes makes her feel and what God thinks of her don't always, actually alot of the time don't always match..
God delights over her uniqueness, Yes mate.....
AMENxxx (End of Rant)
Wednesday, 12 October 2011
Just got in, after an evening serving but mostly being little miss chatterbox, to the people who come to the food Kitchen in our Nuneaton Church and it was brilliant..
Lots of great chats and love shown... Its brilliant when you get to show Gods love in really simple practical ways..like giving someone some nice warm apple crumble to eat and they go back for 2 more portions or give out a coat/blanket to keep them warm, when they are sleeping rough in really rubbish places..
I was reading the below scripture yesterday from Ephesians 2 and it really spoke to me, about how I go about carrying this this church time in my life as sometimes I can carry too much ....
'7-10Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It's God's gift from start to finish! We don't play the major role. If we did, we'd probably go around bragging that we'd done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.
I love that its his work and he loves me being a part of it... It's not my job to way myself down with thinking' its how good we are as a team.' He saves not us !
He has showered me with grace and kindness, now I get to do the same to his hurting sons and daughters..
Tuesday, 11 October 2011
This makes me very happy, I am now gona cane it, I have forgotten just how good rose was, way better than Amy, Bring her back BBC....
Here's to series 2 to be watched in a day, me thinks... xx
And I have found out that the old doctor who Mr David Tennant is in Coventry,doing some filming, as half of Coventry have phoned me up to let me know. I think people think I would go and hide in a bush and wait for him to walk by and pounce on him...which is not true, it would be a large shrub or hedge for the best disguise. haha...
Thursday, 6 October 2011
Last night at the Food program we do at church. I met 2 guys who are sleeping in tents. On some green field somewhere. they said its been okay when the weather has been nice and sunny, but as today defiantly feels the beginning of winter, I can't help but think of them.
Right now I am lying on a nice comfortable warm dry bed, with clean duvets and thick woolly socks from M&S ... whilst they are out there freezing, only a thin piece of canvas to cover them from the blazing wind and relentless rain, I hear outside crashing against my window... and to be honest I feel like a hypocrite.
I rant about trying to help them, yet here I am, all snug as a bug in a rug... But do I want to give this up and go and join them.. Flip No !
So what Am I suppose to do? I am praying for them but it just doesn't seem enough, we are trying to get them sorted with supplies and are feeding them and trying to get to know them, but it doesn't help the instant problem of 'tonight and tomorrow and the day after that they are in the cold' .
It's a tough situation, but there is nothing more really I can do , they really need to help themselves...
But no matter how much I try I can still hear the wind and is it me or does it keeps getting louder and louder....
Sunday, 2 October 2011
'I gave you brokenness , Shame sin and dirt.
You gave me unending love, freedom to be joyfull and hope.
The most unfairest swap, yet you drank it in, Suffered it and lived it for me
The purest heart stop beating on earth.
I don’t always get it, don’t always see...'
the above lyrics are from my first proper praise song, I've wrote and put out into the world..
I played it the other night to people, but didn't tell them before, just slipped it in between some Hillsong, was seriously shaking but they went with it.praising..
Who'd of thought it, me writing a song.. about the goodness of God.
If you'd have told me this 4 years ago I would of laughed in your face, but here I am...
Hilarious... Gods so Crazy cool.