Any Minute now !

Highs and Lows..

The Last few weeks, have been a roller coaster ride for me, I have had some amazing highs and a few weeks ago, a proper crappy low... 

I will admit, I Had a good two days of having a pity party for myself and thinking, 'I was going to leave it a while before praying that prayer 'break my heart for what break yours' as I felt broken enough for a few days.

It was in these few days God really showed me something, First of all, How great God's Church is.

Seriously my church stepped right up and became a needed rock for me , with prayers and love being thrown all over me. I felt supported big time.

Also God taught me alot about my perception of Grace and how still after all this time, I can still try and put levels of grace and the people involved into boxes.

The Scripture of 'My Grace is sufficient for you' became alot more real, when I got to see the pain and hurt of sin, proper up close, but also to see the cage that the sinner was in, and that there really is no difference in his Love and Grace , Its all a one size fits all, Grace.. 

Looking form the other side I can see how God is a great recycler and now feel ready to pray that prayer again.

I know I didn't even feel a fraction of what he feels, when it comes to his heart being broken, which just blows my mind, that that's how much he loves me.

So here I go again, saying let me see what you see, and dare i say it, Feel what you feel.

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.- o Holy Night

x

Mat Kearney - Dancing In The Dark with lyrics (a cover)

Adrenaline into your soul...

'Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!' -Hebrews 12:2-4

'Freely'

"I will love them freely." — Hosea 14:4
 

This sentence is a body of divinity in miniature. He who understands its meaning is a theologian, and he who can dive into its fullness is a true master in Israel. It is a condensation of the glorious message of salvation which was delivered to us in Christ Jesus our Redeemer. The sense hinges upon the word “freely.”
 This is the glorious, the suitable, the divine way by which love streams from heaven to earth, a spontaneous love flowing forth to those who neither deserved it, purchased it, nor sought after it. It is, indeed, the only way in which God can love such as we are.
 The text is a death‐blow to all sorts of fitness: “I will love them freely.” Now, if there were any fitness necessary in us, then He would not love us freely, at least, this would be a mitigation and a drawback to the freeness of it. But it stands, “I will love you freely.”

We complain, “Lord, my heart is so hard.” “I will love you freely.” “But I do not feel my need of Christ as I could wish.” “I will not love you because you feel your need; I will love you freely.” “But I do not feel that softening of spirit which I could desire.” Remember, the softening of spirit is not a condition, for there are no conditions; the covenant of grace has no conditionality whatever; so that we without any fitness may venture upon the promise of God which was made to us in Christ Jesus, when He said, “He that believeth on him is not condemned.”

 It is blessed to know that the grace of God is free to us at all times, without preparation, without fitness, without money, and without price!

 “I will love them freely.”

I Love Tea.

Whether it be Chai Tea, Peppermint or just the best and original P.G tips, as it's getting colder here, there will be more cups had, to keep the cold at bay and to keep me smiling ...

Unbutton My Lips...

Soak me in your laundry and I’ll come out clean,
    scrub me and I’ll have a snow-white life.
Tune me in to foot-tapping songs,
    set these once-broken bones to dancing.
Don’t look too close for blemishes,
    give me a clean bill of health.
God, make a fresh start in me,
    shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life.
Don’t throw me out with the trash,
    or fail to breathe holiness in me.
Bring me back from gray exile,
    put a fresh wind in my sails!
Give me a job teaching rebels your ways
    so the lost can find their way home.
Commute my death sentence, God, my salvation God,
    and I’ll sing anthems to your life-giving ways.
Unbutton my lips, dear God;
    I’ll let loose with your praise.

-Psalm 51:7-15

Autumn...

The Sleep Prayer...

This week, we had a friend at the Boomerang Project, who is really struggling to sleep, and get rest. To the point where he feels like the shell of a human, it is always crazy to see what worry , anxiety and pain can do to your sleep pattern and in turn, onto your life.

So as his friends, a few of us made a declaration, every night before we go to bed, we all pray for him, to have a good night sleep, we pray, he leaves all his worries and weight of troubles back in dream land, and he wakes up refreshed and excited about the day.

To know that there are people that would stand with him on his troubles, was new to him, the fact that a few people, would take time out of their lives to focus on him really connected to his core, it deeply moved him.

Holding and standing with each other when we struggle to hold our selves up, is what God's Love is all about.

I consider it a privilege to pray for him, and I pray come this Wednesday when I See him again, he tells me he's had the best week of sleep ever.

Rainy Day prayers..

All its done for the last 24 hours is rain, very heavy,  and as I am so lazy, I decided to have an indoor prayer session.

My friend Diane came round and we just prayed and spent time with God and it was fab, had such a good time, loving on the Lord. whilst listening to the rain on the Roof.

I actually don't mind the rain, when things like this happen,

Trying to Keep a grip on God.

This week Life and the ministry that i work at, has been pretty rough and bumpy. It's one of those weeks, where I can't really do or say anything, but just be there.

These are the times, I find it tough, as I like to have answers to questions, and the fact that, my main answer is 'We don't know why? just trust in God' is always hard.

Hebrews 10:22-25
So let’s do it—full of belief, confident that we’re presentable inside and out. Let’s keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps his word. Let’s see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out, not avoiding worshipping together as some do but spurring each other on, especially as we see the big Day approaching.

Downton Abbey Series 3 starts today 'enough said'.

Grace Wobble

Tonight was one of those nights, where my grace level seemed to have a wobble.

A man we have tried to help, and have loved and prayed for , seemed tonight to not want to help himself.

Frustration seemed to be my main emotion, 'if this guy could only think straight' 'make a logical choice' and 'help himself' were the words coming off my tongue. But then I look at him and see these questions have no place in his world.

All he sees is his desires and needs right now. No the sensible, healthy choice, but the choice of this moments desire.

Do you think God could sometimes look at us like that?

Sometimes I make choices in the moment, and regret it quickly after whether it be a swear word or a harsh action.

I quickly snapped out of my lack of grace, 'i'm not known for my logical actions and I remembered, with God there is no level of sin.

God sees us the same. Both with issues that needs heavens restoration..

At least the other guy is more honest with his.

Man... I still have sooo much too learn. xx

' If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to seperate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?

-Alexander Solzhenitsyn

I'm a little Teapot.

'You can be a little, but powerful person,

I'm Just a teapot,and everyone has a teapot in their kitchen. You don't go to your friends house and say 'Wow, you have a teapot' you are not surprised, but when your friend Say's would you like some tea ? You immediately say ' Yes I would love some ' then you sit at the table and have a cup of tea and feel so loved and welcomed and accepted.

 You and I are little teapots. We get filled with love and simply pour out, that's what teapots are made for ,to pour out

Shampa Rice-Igniting Furious Love

From Curry to Coffins..

Last night at the project I work at, we had 2 Sikh people come a local temple, to cook for our project, their food was amazing, like seriously amazing, freaking hot, but amazing, they said they had made it as mild as they could, but all us British people were running for cups of water... am hoping they want to cook for us again.

Today I went to visit a friend of the project in Hospital, addiction seems to be winning with him, but the battle isn't over ... It was quite a wake up call, to what we do and the battle that we are against, addiction is seriously putting people in cages and in coffins, and its our jobs as Gods hands and feet, to stop this from happening..

Some want to live within the sound of church or chapel bell; I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of hell.

 

You Decked me with Wildflowers..

You did it: you changed wild lament
      into whirling dance;
   You ripped off my black mourning band
      and decked me with wildflowers.
   I'm about to burst with song;
      I can't keep quiet about you.
   God, my God,
      I can't thank you enough.- Psalm 30: 11-12

Coffee With Jesus

Very Interesting !

Changing English Weather.

so far today, weather wise we have had, Gorgeous clear blue sky first thing, followed by rain, then another clear blue sky. Right now there is lots of grey clouds, but I am sure in an hour it will be lovely and sunny.

Farmers fear unkindly May
Frost by night and hail by day
June just rains and never stops
Thirty days and spoils the crops
In July the sun is hot
Is it shining? No, it's not
August cold, and dank, and wet
Brings more rain than any yet
Bleak September's mist and mud
Is enough to chill the blood
Then October adds a gale
Wind and slush and rain and hail
Dark November brings the fog
Should not do it to a dog
Freezing wet December then:
Bloody January again!

- A Song of the weather -Michael flanders.

Jesus Empowers women..

Whilst at the Momentum festival this year. I attended quite alot of the seminars, which were brillaint. My favourite was by a lady called Danielle Strickland, It was a great talk about Jesus and his love to see women liberated and not be oppressed, by church legalism and doctrine, but to actually walk completely and freely in his plans. The seminar was so good I went straight out to the bookshop, and brought the book, to get deeper in her thoughts on this subject.

It is fabulous.

Danielle herself also is pretty feisty. She is part of the salvation army, an social justice fighter, and basically a kick ass women. She ended up a few years ago, getting the salvation army to have a stall in a sex convention and champoin the cause of human sex traficking.

Her book and this topic, has really started to get me thinking about my place in Gods church, and my church's perception of where they think I fit and do I agree ? and more importantly what does God say about it.

From this I have started to read lots of other books, and its amazing the things you find about the oppression of women in church history when you start digging.

I have a feeling this is going to be a topic I will be grappelng with for some quite some time. But I am loving discovering and educating myself in the area. If you get a chance to read her book do, it will definatley challenge you.

xxx

Start this day sun-washed.

'There's more: God's Word warns us of danger
      and directs us to hidden treasure.
   Otherwise how will we find our way?
      Or know when we play the fool?
   Clean the slate, God, so we can start the day fresh!
      Keep me from stupid sins,
      from thinking I can take over your work;
   Then I can start this day sun-washed,
      scrubbed clean of the grime of sin.'

-psalm 19:11-13

Dear Jesus..

xxx

The Lost 2 months..

Working Hard at Church.

Seeing Poppy In Ibiza.

Nick and Sarah's Wedding.

On the Plane o Santorini , (supposedly the lost city of Atlantis) Greece

Getting my greek on in Athens.

Mometum Festival

Dee's (BFF) Wedding

Dee's Hen night

Being my usual Hobo self.

Having a good time on the DanceFloor.

Sorry that this post has been so long in coming. Life has been crazy mental here, with lots of stuff happening, from trips to Ibiza, Greece (Athens, Santorni) A few weddings including my best friends wedding, a Festival and  a few friends visting. (the photo's above, are a random selection of all the different things that have happened) and trying to keep Boomerang fresh and passionate for God.

 I let my blog slip to an all time low, but am happy to say after a lttle rest I am back, and ready for the next season of my random updates.

The question is are you?

A Good Tuesday.

Today was a rather mad crazy amazing day.

It started out with me going to a meeting ,I had arranged with a man, who wants to get free from alcohol, so we arranged to meet up at church, to go to a special doctors to get him into a recovery project.but he was a no show, this happens alot in my work, so we pray, give it to God, and ask that he would still be moving towards recovery.

A few hours later I find myself in going into a local club, which I have never been in before, as soon as I stepped in, I felt, just a heaviness trying to crush me. At the bar, I stand there being ignored and as soon as he looks at me, I announce I am from church down the road, which he responds with  a smirk on his face. I totally felt in the devils play pit. it was crazy. The 70 year old bar man then decided he wanted to try and make me feel as UN-comfortable as possible by saying dirty stuff, and trying to see my reaction, whilst screaming at Jesus to help me inside my head. I told him 'God loves all people' and walked away shakily, awakened to a new place where I am going to put a bulls eye on with my prayers.

After heading back to base. and having a cuppa of tea, one of our lads who has been with the since day one, asked if he could give his life to God, (he freakin asked us!). So I sat with him as gave his life to God. ( I am now crying as i write this again). 10 minutes later another guy  who hadn't known what had gone on with the first guy, also gave his life to God.  whilst all this happening I was trying to control my tears. 

I am now sitting down, amazed at Gods timing and work. and I can say I am actually so privileged that Gods allows me to do this.

Today truely was a heaven shaking day.

right I need to go and re-apply my makeup...

44 years in the waiting...

Last weekend one of our guys from the Boomerang Project came to church . The Gentlemen hadn't stepped into a church in 44 years ( in the last week he's been in twice) and when he came in the first thing he said was 'where are the pews' . He then said it looked more like a concert than a church, as he had been made to go to his local church when he was a young lad.

Throughout the whole service, he listened and stood. And when the collection box came around, I told him he didn't have to put anything in, its just for the regulars, ( to be honest, I felt bad ,as this guy is homeless and didn't want him feeling poor inside the church as well) but he turned to me and said, 'its the least he could do for God, as his people have been doing alot for him lately,' at which point I started to get teary eyed, so stared at the ceiling for half an hour.

Of everything that day one of the comments that stand out the most is when he said, it was the atmosphere of love and friendliness inside the building that he liked most. It was great to see church people make a bee line for him, and rejoice over him, Its like God opened people's eyes to see him and gave out bucket loads of boldness to introduce themselves to him.

I will be seeing him tonight and I am sure he will keep going on about these amazing coincidences that keep happening to him. Last week he said 'right now, his drug is life', he said he's 'enjoying life again'. How good is God  and his church when we see people through his eyes.